Summary: Things get hot between House and his new underling who is an Irish beauty and a prodigy. (WOW. This stinks of Mary-Sue already!)
(And I would also like to say that her other story for the 'Rescue Me' fandom has an oddly similar summary . . ."This occurs before Season 4. Tommy meets his equal when an Irish girl enters the ranks and drives straight into his heart.")
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Standing in the elevator was a woman, maybe twenty-two years old with shoulder-length, choppy fiery red hair and one blonde lock. She changed songs on her black iPod not paying attention to House staring at her. She had one blue eye and one brown eye and one purple eye blinking up at him from the side of her neck. House studied her with interest; the corners of his lips turning up into a smirk. She wore a long-sleeved red, v-neck American eagle shirt with a white tank top underneath, butterscotch corduroy pants and black heeled boots. A Burberry scarf wrapped around her neck.
The elevator stopped at his office level and they both got off as she tucked her iPod back into her faux snake-skin print purse. He flipped on the lights to the large office before turning and seeing the girl in the elevator standing at the door.
"Hello." He stated simply with arched brows of surprise. She flashed a pearly white smile.
"You must be Doctor House. I'm Ginger, Ginger O'Hare." (Ginger! Of course! The beautiful, unusual name of a fucking MARY-SUE!) She said, a thick Irish accent following her smooth voice. (Uh oh, is she a mutant, too? Is she able to make every man fall in love with her with just the sound of her voice? Probably.) He glanced around a bit as he stood with his cane.
"I don't suppose you're a stripper." (She might as well be.) He said sarcastically before she reached into her purse and pulled out an envelope to him promptly. Reluctantly, he snatched the envelope and began opening it.
"It's almost ten o'clock in the morning, and I have a replacement for my underling that ran off to Europe with her new loaded hubby already. Then in ten seconds Cuddy is going to walk in with her face scrunched up and she'll screech like a hyena about how hard it was to get you here from across the globe. Tell me, did your hospital administrator have a permanent pole wedged up his ass?"
Ginger blinked in utter surprise before he offered her a seat on the white comfy chair, instantaneously she crossed her legs. He eyed her with interest before digging in a bunch of papers on his desk and pulled out her résumé.
"You're a pediatrician, a diagnostician, and a toxicologist. (WHY am I not surprised? She's totally better than House? Of course; only a Mary-Sue could pull it off.) You are how old? Thirty? (It'd be reasonable, wouldn't it?)"
"I'm twenty four, I'm just smart. I graduated high school at fourteen (lmao, God, whatever.), college at twenty, and here I am."
"Oh goodie. My two other underlings will be coming in, one by the name of Eric Foreman; my neurologist, and Robert Chase, my human scratch post." He spoke before sitting in his chair. Ginger looked around a bit in curiosity. "I assume you've gotten cozy somewhere?"
"Uhm yes I have. A nice little apartment not far from here. The address if 13376 Treestop Avenue. I'm still getting used to the way things work. My apartment number is 204. My citizenship came through so I can legally work in this country. The spare key is hidden under the Ficus plant. Come over any time . . ." She spoke as two men walked in. An Australian, Chase, and an African American, Foreman. Ginger took off her black peacoat and hung it up with her scarf, tucking her gloves into her coat pocket as House let her wear his white coat. (Awwwww . . . Actually, don't look too into it. House hates the lab coats. You're just an excuse to get out of wearing it when Vogler gets on his ass about it again.) Lisa Cuddy, the Chief of Medicine, came into the office as she had a file in her hands.
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"You're very good with kids, is that why you're a pediatrician?"
"Yes and No."
Foreman arched a brow "Is that a trick question?"
"No. It's not. I'm a pediatrician because I want to see children live, not die." She was very terse. Was this a touchy subject for her? Foreman backed off, not wanting to press her buttons. Chase was working the neo-natal unit. House watched her come back in as he tossed his ball up into the air and onto his cane.
"I can already tell you what the kid has." (Of course you can! You're like some psychic psycho who knows more than HOUSE!) Ginger said as she sat down at the table before Foreman wrote ‘ataxia' on the whiteboard. House glanced to her for an answer as she got up and erased the symptoms and wrote ‘Erdheim-Chester Syndrome'.
"Why? How can an 8 year old boy have ECS?" ('Cause this is House, M.D.!! Any disease is possible!) Foreman said with an upset tone that the newbie figured it out before him. (Seriously, don't sweat it, Foreman. She's a Mary-Sue. It'd be against her nature if she wasn't better than you.) Ginger sighed a little.
"Bloody Diarrhea, stomach pain, ataxia, and if we don't treat him for ECS then he'll get renal, pituitary and respiratory failure which are all treatable, except for death well that's permanent!" She became snappish and that grabbed House's attention immediately. It was a female Irish version of him! (Of course! All she needs now is a cane, a fucked up leg, and an addiction to painkillers and she could be your TWIN!) Foreman looked over at House for help.
"Treat the boy for ECS." He ordered Foreman before he threw up his arms before storming out to go treat him. House stood up as he watched Ginger and her body language.
"Spill it Ginger," He said as she glanced to him.
"It's personal alright? There's no reason you need to know my life." (This is the angst-y build up part before she pulls the Total Mary-Sue card and spills her whole LIFE'S STORY when she just said she WOULDN'T.)
"If it's going to affect your performance here in this office you might as well get your green card revoked and go back to Dublin."
Ginger took that as a threat before she sighed a little. "In my entire life, I've always wanted to be a mom. Ever since I was four, carrying baby dolls and pushing carriages with my mother. When I was seventeen, both my parents died and I lived with my boyfriend. He dumped me after we both learned I'm barren. I stuck it out while I was in college and that's why…I went for pediatrician." (Ta Da!) She said quickly. House looked her up and down for a moment.
"They have medication that might be able to correct that, or diagnose why you're barren." He said looking away from her.
Ginger reminded him of Stacy, and it had been so long since he felt these kinds of emotions. Even though he hated it, he loved it. It was good for him. Ginger watched him as he looked away. They'd met not even three hours ago and they both acted like they had known each other for years. "Why don't you come over tonight and I will walk you through the hospital system, how to manipulate Cuddy, blackmail Wilson, and command the underlings when I don't feel like it, and all the while we can have hot, rambunctious, cripple sex on my piano. How 'bout it?"
Ginger blushed a deep crimson before she nodded curtly. It would be impolite to refuse his offer. (Oh, please. We all know you want to get into his pants like the whore you are.) After all, she needed to learn more about this place and his body. House limped over to the coat rack and put on his coat and his backpack. "Get your coat, we're going now. Foreman can page me if he needs me. Besides, he has Chase."
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"In the hospital Cuddy runs the show, and if you can manipulate her you're in really good shape. Wilson is Head of Oncology but stay away from him; he has a fetish for needy women. Chase is an ex-rich boy from the land down under who got cut out of daddy's will. Foreman is my brain-damaged neurologist who used to steal cars but we treated from for nalgera after a brain biopsy. Me? I'm just an ass with a bum leg."
"I'm just an Irish immigrant with three majors from Ireland's most prestigious college, a medical prodigy (Um . . . wow, you're conceited little tramp, aren't'cha?), and can't have any children. (Good. You deserve any.)"
Ginger sat down on his couch as he came in with two beers and some white sharp cheddar cheese.
"Is that the only reason why your life sucks? I know a bunch of guys that would like a chance with you even if you can't have children."
"I'm not sleeping with you." (lmfao, that was conceited and a half-assed attempt at stalling the inevitable.) Ginger said bluntly as she knocked back the Budweiser. He chuckled a little.
"Well that rains on my parade, I might be able to help you with your mommy issues."
"Prescribe fertility medication? Invitro-fertilization? I've tried it. I've tried everything under the sun and nothing works. I'm barren."
"You've never been with me." He looked over to her. He was clinging to the spindles of love he felt already for this woman and he wasn't going to let go without a hard fight. (See! She's a mutant! She's already voodooed him into thinking that he loves her and all that bullshit.)
"You can't do anything House, and that's the end of the fairytale. Besides, its not like sleeping with you is some magic cure! (DING, DING, DING! We've got us a winner!)" She said before he leaned over and gave her a kiss. They'd met nine hours ago and he was already kissing her. In that kiss Ginger realized how lonely she was in the world and kissed him back. He pulled away after a moment.
"If you tell me no, I'll push until I get what I want. You say I can't, and I say you can, just trust me." He said to her softly.
"Besides, you're better off with me that you are with say Wilson who thrives of neediness." (Seeing as this story has all the elements of a classic Sue!fic, I'm going to assume that House has this Semen of Magic or something, which in turn gives him the ability to impregnate barren women.)
In the morning House was disturbed from his slumber by his phone, the clock reading 10:13. He irritatedly grabbed it "This better be important."
"Get in here right now and cover your clinic hours!" the bark of Cuddy rang in House's ears
"Late night, sorry."
"That's right, yesterday was hooker night." Cuddy said sarcastically "Get in here now." House hung up the phone with a yawn.
"I'm going to do clinic so Cuddy can remove the stick that's shoved up her ass." He got up as he spoke before Ginger sat up in his bed, covered by a sheet, her hair a mess. (HOE! You're literally a contradiction. You say you won't tell him your life's story, and then you do. You say you're not going to sleep with him, and then you do. Next, you're gunna have a kid even though you say you're barren.)
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"Go away Wilson, I can hear you caring."
The door lock clicked and the door open as House sighed a bit "Remind me to change the locks." He looked at Ginger as Wilson came in with his bags. "I need a place to stay."
"What happened to you Dr. Wilson?" Ginger asked as she set her food down and got off the couch to help him.
"My wife…kicked me out." He said as he watched her pick up his bags as House stood up.
"Ginger hand me my cane,"
"What for?"
"I have a bum leg and I need to beat the crap out of the only oncologist in this room."
"What did I do!?" Wilson protested throwing his hands up.
"Get a hotel. You have the money, you aren't staying under the same roof as her," House said and Ginger just watched, not wanting to oppose House.
"You choose some girl you've known for upwards of two days over me, who you've known for years." He said and that made
Ginger a little peeved herself, her temper flaring (Hey! The guy's right! Get lost, tramp!) and House noticed this.
"And you're pissing her off. Keep it up and I don't get laid tonight." House said before grabbing his cane to be able to walk.
"I'm sorry all right? I take it back, please House…just a couple of days and then I'll leave." He said with a begging tone. House sighed and looked to Ginger who was overcome by her hospitable nature and put Wilson's stuff in the extra closet and his toiletries in the bathroom. House went over to Wilson.
"If you lay one finger on her, you'll be explaining to Cuddy why you have two broken knees." He said as a threat (Oh, another Mary-Sue symptom: making a canon character possessive and OOC.) and Wilson blinked a bit and rubbed the back of his head.
"I will take that into thought and Ginger, thank you for putting my things away."
"Your welcome." She nodded before she picked up her diner again and finished it and threw away the container.
"I'll be back in a minute." House looked to her after leaning down to give her a quick kiss before looking at Wilson. "Just turn the television up if things get a little too loud for you." With that he went back to his bedroom and shut the door.
"How come he's a jerk?" she asked him (Because there was this Irish chick who's, like, super smart and superheroine beautiful, graduated from school when she was, like, in first grade, knows everything medical in the whole wide world, sexes up the first guy she meets on the first day, then totally steals said-guy from his best friend of, like, FOREVER.) as she got into bed with him, resting her head on House's chest.
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"Dark one, where's the Shamrock?" He said, still referring to his girlfriend by the shamrock as Foreman looked up to him and shook his head a bit. House blinked a bit. "What aren't you telling me?"
"When Chase called this morning, Ginger answered and then she was on her way in driving your motorcycle. Wilson said that she learned to drive it from watching from the back. She made a wide turn and slid, crashing into a pole. She's in ICU now." (Holy hell! Another symptom! Mary-Sue gets herself horribly injured and every canon character in the show bestows her their pity, love, and utmost attention while every patient DIES from their silly diseases!)
"Why didn't anyone call me," He said with a flash of anger before he limped to the elevator to head up to the ICU. Ginger's back was covered in road rash, a concussion, and both her legs were broken. (Well, at least she's got the 'fucked up leg' part down now.) She was awake but much disoriented and Chase saw House and went outside.
"She's going to be fine but…her accent is gone,"
"What do you mean gone?" House said in a snap as Chase stared at him.
"Her concussion must've affected the speech center in the brain, her accent is gone. She speaks normally when we ask her questions but otherwise she's disoriented from the medication. (Is that even possible?) We're treating her road rash with anti-biotic cream; the first layer of skin on her back was ripped clean off. Her left femur and right tibia were snapped and they used pins and bolts to pull the bones back together."
House moved into the room as her attention turned to House limping to her side before she looked away in shame.
"I'm sorry," she said with no accent in her voice.
"I'm not breaking up with you so don't look away Ginger," He said with no anger or sarcasm in his tone. She looked over to him, concern washing over his eyes.
"Wilson offered to drive but I said no, because I'd watched you drive the motorcycle. (Ah, so this isn't a God-Mode Mary-Sue, but a Emo!Angst!Seriously-Thought-She-Could-Do-Anything!Mary-Sue.) I thought I could do it…but I couldn't. I'm sorry I wrecked it."
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"Greg," she said as he stopped to wait for her. "I have something to tell you…"
"Walk and Talk." He said with a nod of his head as they went upstairs.
"I'm pregnant." (lmfao, SEE! God, fucking whatever. I wanna punch the daylights out of this author so much . . .) She said which made House stop cold. Ginger tilted her head a bit as she came around to face him. "Greg?" she said with concern.
She was ecstatic; this was a miracle pregnancy. She was barren but she was three months pregnant. He was still frozen to the spot as Foreman came up and stared, puzzled.
"What's going on?" He looked to Ginger who as she blushed.
"I'm pregnant, and I'm barren." (Er . . . sorry, lady, but you can't be both unless you're some sort of freak.)
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"I want to name her Sloe, Sloe Amelia." (Oh, lovely. A future Mary-Sue.)
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"…Greg?"
"Good, you're awake."
"Is the baby okay?"
"Sloe's fine but you aren't. You have a hole in your heart (lmao . . . wow, this just get's better and better, huh?) wall and you'll be put on a tissue regenerate that won't harm Sloe but it will repair the hole and rebuild the muscle." He said running his hand on her cheek.
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House was sitting in his office playing with his red and grey tennis ball. Before Wilson could open his mouth House heaved a sigh.
"She's having an affair." (lmfao, I was WRONG! The drama just keeps coming!)
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The wedding in Dublin was lavish and little Sloe Amelia House was able to be held during the ceremony at two months old.
Wilson had seen a drastic change in his friend but he still was a dense, ignorant asshole yet he was a devoted dad and melted when he was with his daughter. He sat in his office with a book over his face before Lisa picked it up.
"Clinic. Now."
"Sorry, up late."
"What internet porn again?"
"No, Sloe has cholic." (leik, NOE WAI! SRSLY?!! The whole family is doomed to be fucked up! A mom who has holes in her heart, a dad who has a messed up leg and a drug addiction, and a kid who has something eerily similar to "colic".)
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